The Fools Pilgrimage – Loneliness 

St Teresa (Mother Teresa) famously said that the worst of all poverty is loneliness – and she was right!

I was listening to a podcast earlier this week and it gave a stark reality that the biggest cause of deaths for under 45yr old men was suicide – being a man means your 4 times more likely to take your own life than their female counterpart and in single guys (that includes divorced blokes) it’s 8 times more!! 

There seems to be lots of contributors to this but one reoccurring point found in suicide notes are the words – “I’m worthless!” And “I’ve got no value”

There’s been a few times in my life when I can relate to that! Feelings of being unloved, unvalued, unappreciated for whatever reason can deffo make you feel lonely, unvalued and worthless! And send you into a dark spiral!

In those times, even if we have loads of money in the bank! Lots of people in our phone book! 1000’s of followers on our social media! Lot’s of many blessings and good stuff around us!

Even then, if we don’t feel affection, appreciation and have the loving attention of those around us we feel alone!

And that is the worst feeling!

I did an experiment some years ago, I was sat in a busy airport with loads of people all around me and purposely shut myself off and felt very alone! It was horrible!! 

I felt sick, and upset and all I wanted to do was run off to the bathroom, lock myself into a cubicle cry and throw up!

But I didn’t, instead I looked at the person sat next to me and said:- “hello,” it started a conversation and it turns out they were feeling exactly the same!

Another traveller joined in with our conversation and all of a sudden we had a party going on! Not a rave or disco but a lightness came across the room that 5 minutes before was quite a hostile, sterile and lonely place.

What then changed?

Love! 

I don’t mean that we fell madly in love with each other in some kind of passionate or sentimental way, simply a recognition and realisation that we were both travellers on a journey thru the geography and biography of this thing called life.

According to Huey Lewis, the power of love is a curious thing – and it sure is – it can change your heart from a feeling of loneliness into something wonderful.

Sat in that cold, grey, alien airport lounge there was no love! Then starting a conversation and greeting this stranger sat next to me with love turned the situation into a friendly encounter, and like watching an old black and white movie everything suddenly turns into technicolour.

You see LOVE is the magic ingredient, it’s an extra L that turns us from feeling ALONE into ALL ONE!

And, when you and the people around you are ALL ONE – it doesn’t matter where you are from, where you are going, the colour of your physical body, the thoughts that jump around your mind, the background you have – in that space right NOW you are not alone!

Reading this right NOW you are not alone – you are appreciated and valued – I appreciate that you’ve read this so far – thank you for that.

But, How can we do this? How can we send out some love? 

Lots of ways – do something you enjoy and spread that joy to others, I love exercise and teaching a fitness class last night was so much fun that one of the participants messaged me after and said her jaw was hurting from laughing so much. Think of all the good things around you and be grateful for that, talk to someone maybe just in passing walking along the street.

Give someone a compliment, either out loud, or if you can’t get the words out say it in the quiet of your mind – it still works.

We’ve all been alone too long – it’s time to spread the love and recognise we’re all one.

If you’re reading this – know that you do have value, there are people in your life that think you’re a wonderful person, they think you’re a brilliant person and love you just the way you are!

Someone might be thinking of you right now! And if someone you know pops into your mind maybe send them a message/txt/email/high five to let them know you think they are pretty valuable 😊

What can you do for yourself today that means you add value to who you are and what you do? This could be something in work? At home? In your relationship? With your kids? Your family? Your friends? Your health?

I’m gonna call my mum 😉

Namaste – Have a Great Day

Don’t be shy – reply and let’s build a happy place